Little sticks and pieces of wood have been washed and sanded by the tumultuous waters of the river. However they started in the water they've ended smooth and shaped and perfect. Then they've washed up on the shore to wait for the waters to rise once more so they can travel the winding water ways again until they reach the ocean. I decided to take a breath again and go to the river specifically looking for these smoothly shaped bleached little sticks.  I brought three girls and a dog with me so that we could look for the ones that were shaped just right by the water.  See I have a plan.  I want to create these little sailboats with these girls. These boats that remind us this year that there will be rough waters and smooth calm seas but in every instance we are being shaped and sanded smooth by both the times that are  tumultuous and the quiet. I want to paint some scripture upon these boats that will remind us that God loves us as we are and he will shape and smooth our rough edges.  Our time at the river was full of goofing off, watching the dog splash through that cold water, and teasing each other.  It was a little breath, watching the girls connect.  Then we were on to the farm, to look at the animals and even though they are young women the playground still holds it's appeal to them. Watching them play, I was reminded how fleeting childhood actually is and I want them to hold on to it for as long as possible. Again the sailboats will teach as they remind.

I sat against a sunbleach log with my feet in the sand as I looked out towards the Sound. The kids were turning over rocks looking for treasures such as crab, sand dollars and the occasional sea glass. The dog ran all over the rocky beach with his nose in over drive exploring, excited and full of life. I sat there with my magazines, books, camera, and my knitting and I took a deep breath. I sat there thinking that this was what I needed.  I needed to breathe, I needed to feel the rhythm of the ocean as the waves lapped the shore.  In Oregon, the waves crash and roar even on calm days but here in the sound, the waves are gentle and quiet on calm days. The kids explored the coast line and carved their names in a clay cliff, I soaked up the sun, quiet and content. The kids climbed boulders that were previously underwater as the tide went out. I prayed for my family, my friends, my year. The kids talked and laughed and I thought and I breathed.  This school year I want to take more time to breathe deep, enjoy the small simple things, to be grateful for each gift whether that gift is a couple hours at the shore or a morning of coffee with a friend or a clean empty sink. I thought about being more purposeful in my daily life to enjoy the little things and to breathe. It was a good day and I came home refreshed.

My husband likes blackberry pie. He's also a plant guy. He notices when the wild blackberries start to ripen and he starts hinting about blackberry pie and cobbler. "Do you want me to pick you some blackberries?" "The blackberries are turning." It's just his thing and it's one of the endearing qualities of his. The other day he took the boys blackberry picking and Lona jumped on her bike to find them. She was missing out. They had gone to a different spot than I thought so she never did find them. Later I took Job and Lona blackberry picking. I needed blackberries for pies at church. Job was more interested in exploring the area than picking and Lona wandered all over picking just the best berries. Earlier this week John asked me to make blackberry pie for work. He had scheduled a time for the people he works with to eat lunch together and he would bring dessert. So Monday I made pie crust.  Deb at SmittenKitchen has the best pie crust recipe. It calls for using very cold butter but I keep mine in the freezer and take it out as I'm getting out ingredients to make the crust. If I'm in a hurry I'll buy store bought crust but this recipe is the best, flaky and buttery and everything a pie crust should be. She's also a great photographer which is how I stumbled onto her blog in the first place. If it doesn't look yummy and make you want to eat then I don't want to cook it.  I'm sure there are a lot of recipes out there that are delicious but the photos don't do them justice. I eat first with my eyes. I am very visual so food has to appeal to my sense of sight as well as my sense of taste and sense of smell. Then for the filling part I searched Pinterest and found two blogs that I combined the recipes to make the filling. Both of these sites princesstofu and CallMeCupcake have beautiful photos that made me want to try their pie fillings. So last night John and Lona went out to pick blackberries. They came home about a half hour later with over a gallon of blackberries for me to wash and make into galettes. I love calling my pies galettes because I suck at making pretty pie crust edges and with a galette, all I have to do is fold my pie crust over the filling, brush with an egg wash and sprinkle some sugar on it. It then becomes a beautiful rustic galette instead. It makes me think of the ugly duckling story.

I've discovered two great magazines through a third magazine.  They make me want to write, to leave a little bit of my soul upon the pages, to match my moods to my photos. Because of these magazines, I've worked hard to keep the house clean/picked up for 3 days! I know that I can relax when the house is quiet and clean. I know that I can breath when I feel like my work is done. I know that I need a few things in order to "breath". One is a clean house.  A messy house I think makes me feel almost claustrophobic.  Yes, like the walls are caving in around me, like I'm drowning, caught in a whirlpool. A clean house makes me feel at peace. I love the dishes done and a clean sink. I love the floors swept and the dinning room table ready for the next meal. I love the living room ready for me to kick off my shoes and snuggle up under a blanket with a good book. Another thing I need is a creative outlet. Whether that outlet is photography, knitting, scrapbooking, or reading something inspiring. I can't be creative with a messy house, I can't breath without some kind of creative project. These two things can spiral, one can lead to another, clean house = creativity and vice versa is true as well. Messy house = no creativity, no big breaths of relaxation. I am not a sit in the tub kind of gal. I don't like to sweat while sitting in water. I don't like having to dry my hands off to read. I don't like the water turning cold and feel like I need a shower because I was sweating and now am sitting in cold water.  I breath when I can create without pressure. So I've been scouring Pinterest for journaling prompts to add into our school days; not just for Lona but for myself as well. I need to write better and I want my soul to show in my writings. I want something more than frivolous writing about our days. We aren't perfect, our life isn't a Mayberry life and I sometimes think that is all I portray. I want to be real with myself and my family through this blog. So I am going to go through the magazine Bella Grace and soak in the photos, the writings, the lists and mark up the pages.  I even want to send in some submissions, I say that and I am scared but oh so excited.

School starts in a week.  The days are getting darker and cooler.  Oh the sun is still shining but each day it gets darker earlier and earlier just by minutes but it's there.  The mornings are crisp, not Montana crisp but Pacific Northwest crisp with dew on the ground and a little fog hanging above the ground. The leaves are changing just a bit. I can feel that fall is creeping towards us.  It's hinting to me that soon I'll be wanting cozy socks and sweaters but for now I am enjoying the sun. I often joke that I'm solar powered but it really isn't a joke.  I'm nervous about this winter. I'm nervous about how I'll feel this winter, how I'll treat my family this winter. I am scared but for now the sun is shining. I cling to the sunshine and warmth. This week before school starts I just want to stay at home everyday and soak up the sun, enjoying the last week before chaos ensues with schoolwork, practices, chores, carpools, laundry, house cleaning and appointments.  Today, when I climbed out of bed, my husband had left for work, my two youngest were spending the night at friend's houses, my oldest was still asleep and it was still and beautiful and quiet. I wasn't needed or faced with a day's worth of cleaning. My oldest went to tennis practice and I still had a couple of hours to myself. It was a gift and I started to reflect on where I am at right now. Right now the sun is shining and I am good.

It seems like more and more as the kids are getting older we have more opportunities to be together.  I love it.  I mean I love the kids and miss them too.  Actually because they are still at home, I don't miss them when we have an afternoon or evening or both together. A few weeks ago John hurt his knee tubing on the lake so we haven't been able to hike or run together but we could go bike riding. We started at Arroyo Park, south Bellingham/Fairhaven and rode out to Larabee Park on the Interurban Trail.  I can kind of be a weenie on the bike and there is one hill that I've always walked the bike down and up it but for some reason this time I was able to conquer my fear of totally wiping out on gravel and I rode the whole thing including the scary hill. John just shakes his head and laughs at me but is so patient. He took Lona here a while back and they were the only ones at the look out spot.  This day we were not alone like we had wanted to be.  There were people everywhere wandering up and down the coast line.  Still beautiful though.  It's amazing to think that we've shared 19+ years together.  I met John 24 years ago this September, almost a quarter of a century ago. I'm looking forward to the adventures still yet to come.