Warning:  A little graphic (makes my stomach queasy)

For the most part we are a healthy family. However there are times when we are not and this is one of those times. It's been a rough patch lately. I have to say that it is hard. Hard when the kids are sick, hard when the husband is sick and hard when I am sick while all the above are sick.  I look back and I think it's started on Christmas when Job injured his toe. He hobbled around and started to get better by the time school started. Which was good, the bad came the second day back when my phone buzzes me with a text asking me to come and get him. I arrive at school, pull him out of class and while I'm signing him out, he's puking in the garbage can. Kids are walking past him and watching the silently puking that was happening. Forever he will be known as the kid who got sick at school. Some things you can live down, but not others.  A couple of days later he's back at school, healthy except for his toe that still is giving him problems. The very next Tuesday he comes home from school and snuggles down under blankets and trying hard to focus on school work but can't.  He asked to go to bed around 8 pm so naturally I check his temperature at it's 104. Yike, no school for him. He lays in bed all the next day and Thursday as well.  On Thursday Isaac calls and comes home early from school and proceeds to lay on the couch all that day. Lona walks in around 3 pm and complains about a headache and goes straight to bed. That's three kids down. Friday morning Job begs to go to school, worried about grades but especially driver's ed. He makes it all day but slept in most of his classes, checking his temperature I realized that it was back up. Isaac and Lona haven't moved from their couches.  This continues through the weekend and by Sunday John isn't feeling good and I'm starting the sniffles. Monday morning Isaac comes downstairs complaining of blood dripping out of his ear. We bundle him up and take him to the Walk-in clinic right away that morning. The doctor looks at his ear and yep, he has an ear infection and a ruptured membrane.  Anti-biotics for the week and it will take some time to heal. He comes home and goes back to bed on the couch. Later that same day, Job takes the bandage off his toe to change it and it starts bleeding profusely again. I call the doctor and they send me to the Walk-in clinic. Once seen it is determined that it will heal better if the toe nail comes off because the toenail bed is raised up and swollen.  The old toenail hasn't fallen off and it's trying to grow a new one. Gross, oh by the way, can you check his ear too because when I looked at it at home, I thought it was infected. Yep, sure thing. The doctor wrote a prescription for him too then proceeded to remove Job's toenail. I held him while he got the shots but when it was time to have the nail removed, he sat up and watched the whole thing, taking pictures with my phone.  The doctor even gave him the toenail in a jar to take home! So boy, so gross.  We pretty much all sat on the couch or laid in bed the rest of the day, trying to recover for a new week.  John who was feeling pretty terrible got up in the morning to get both Job who was feeling better and Lona off to school. By 8 am she called me to come get her. Bringing her home, she quickly emailed her teachers, took her temperature (104) and bundled herself off to bed for the rest of the day. Isaac went to school, came home, worked a little and slept more.  We are off to a great start to the year which means it can only get better.

 “The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” 
― W.B. Yeats

 Lona's room used to be pink and yellow with a flower border between the two colors.  I designed that room when I found out that I was pregnant with a girl. I used a stick for a curtain rod and hung a valance of sheer white cloth with a flower garland that matched almost the border paper.  I used to sit in a rocking chair in that room and dream about having a girl. I had two boys at the time and my life was filled with Legos, trucks, balls and all things very much boy. I had all the little girl clothes ready to go. Thirteen years later and she really didn't want the pink and yellow. She was ready to change. It still was one of my favorite rooms but the border paper was starting to curl up, exactly what I should have expected with a girl after two boys. She is all girl and as tough as a boy on my house and maybe even with her brothers. So as her Christmas gift we told her we would redecorate her room. She chose the colors: Benjamin Moore Paul Revere Grey and Benjamin Moore Rockport Grey.  I thought it would be too dark for such a small room but she likes it.  I gave her a gift card for Hobby Lobby so she could chose what she wanted on the walls and not my choice. I'm hoping for it to reflect her tastes.  The one thing she didn't want to get rid of was her giant cardboard Tardis. The one thing she would like but we are saying no to is hardwood floors in her room. I would love to but there isn't a budget for it, so the carpet stays. Her loft bed was cut down to regular size and we moved the furniture around a couple of times to decide where she might want it.  It is like this for now but may change. The dresser was John's grandmother's dresser and there are some dings here and there but I painted it white and changed the knobs to black.  It feels rather empty right now but she is working on it and thinking about it and when we have time, we'll take a trip  to Hobby Lobby so she can use her gift card.

Fresh as new fallen snow. The year before me stretched out. Expectations are there, but what this year actually holds I have no idea. There are hopes, dreams, and wishes. Do I dare write them down? Do I voice them? Or do I keep them hidden in my heart to be only that, dreams and wishes. I don't want to make resolutions, I want to live intentionally but what questions do I ask myself, what direction do I go in? This last year was a milestone year for our kids. Senior year in high school for Isaac. Freshman year for Job and driver's ed. Public school for Lona and 8th grade. My first year of being at home alone. I thought I was going to take this year off to discover myself but I didn't, things just kept piling up and I took them on: youth group, teaching photography, taking photos and working on starting my own business. Do I take the plunge business wise? Do I look for a job?