A Milestone: College Bound

By Leslie Parks - Wednesday, August 17, 2016

We've spent 18 years with this boy. This is what we've been preparing for. This move to adulthood. It isn't about moving out to live somewhere else. It is about the move from child to adult. It's about the end to parenting and the beginning of a relationship between adults. He has to make his own decisions, evaluate what works and doesn't work and make those changes.  I no longer can tell him those things. I can offer advice when asked for. I can pray. I can call to talk but the time for parenting is done. He needs this time to learn about being the adult in a way that living at home or even near home can never do. He needs to be able to chose his own path, not only long term but daily. I am on the sidelines and no longer an active player in his life.  It doesn't mean that we don't talk or that he doesn't need encouragement but it does mean that it is on his terms. Do I miss him? That is a loaded question. Of course. I miss the laughter around the house that he brings. I miss his insight into different situations. I miss his help and his encouragement. Yet there is another side to that coin.  I don't miss being treated as his staff. I don't miss the mess.  Those garbage bags, well its his clothes that lined his closet and his floor. He can take that mess with him to college and figure that "organization" skill out at school because for 16 of those 18 years, I've been trying to cram it down his throat. I don't miss empty milk jugs on the counter or the fact that I couldn't keep enough bread and cereal in the house. And I think that he might just miss something of home - probably the dog and unlimited access to food.

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